1:30 am | not a mundane musing
Posted by Paurong sa Lunes, Marso 13, 2006
I really do not know if I still love you. You are no longer keeping in touch with me and it seems that you never cared. I am pretty much jealous with the people around you who really have that kind of attention I am begging. Perhaps, you’ve found somebody else better than me. Chuckles! But.. I can’t help thinking about you. Each night I think of you even though you’re not vivid to me. I am still waiting for the perfect time for the two of us to spend times together. I am looking forward on realizing what I truly feel for you. It’s been two months already we’ve known each other. I never imagined someone like you entering my stupid nonsense life. But since you’ve came along, everything changed. My perspective in life grew even better and I looked into life in a brighter angle. I learned how to be a reality chauvinist. I loved life because of you. But whatsoever thing I try to do, it makes no sense anymore. I am trying to be the person who’ll fill the void you have inside yet you are becoming the impediment of your own self. I can’t stop thinking about you. Should I forget you? You even asked me to get rid of you. Then what happened. Yes, something happened. And it was nothing for you. Why can’t you appreciate the thing I am offering for you. Why were you thinking that you’re just nothing to me, and that you are just becoming the influence I must not have? Why should I keep on injecting thoughts of you in my wild busy life? Why can’t I stop thinking about you? I wonder what is happening with you. I wonder what the hell is going on! I do not know if you were really telling me the truth then. Petty things should be left or better yet be buried. You were there, actually, in the bitter moments I had lately, but you didn’t care even a little. I was waiting for you. I was waiting. Or should I wait for another person to come into my life and change me and teach me right from wrong as much as you have done. Had you done that kind of appreciation? I doubt it. And I shouldn’t waste this page for something not worth the trouble.