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10:04 pm | the night before the beginning of the end

Posted by Paurong sa Martes, Hunyo 6, 2006

I cannot deny that I was excited for the first day of classes. For two boring, lonesome months, I induced myself to nothing and I really craved for the hectic skeds, grueling project-makings, taking of notes and the like. I was psyched to death… well, literally.

Sunday afternoon. I cannot believe that I was ran to the hospital because of the pain I had in my stomach or wherever it might be. That was the time when I realized how public hospitals suffer the corruption-oriented government of our time; thus, I was able to voice out the phrase: “bulok ang pamahalaan” (or in English, so to speak, our government sucks–or in a better mood let’s say, our government stinks).

Sunday evening. My Lola wanted me to be absent on my classes the next day but then I disagree and heartfully desired to go home promptly for me to be able to go to school on the first day of classes.

Sunday late evening. I was already tucked in my bed, having a high fever, pondering if my tummy will ache again and if the medicine I took won’t work… and, thinking who of my classmates will I ask the question “Who is the Teen Big Winner?”

Monday midnight. I was still feeling that pain inside me. I was terribly hot but then I reprimanded myself to be strong enough for the next day’s battle. On and off, I was rising to pee and also to drink a glass of water. I was excited on what will happen on school that day.

Monday dawn. It was not just my stomach which was hollering, my heart seemed to be malevolent enough to kill me. I felt this horrifying discomfort in my chest… I couldn’t breath… I thought I was dying…

Monday early sunrise. I was really up. I compelled myself to eat my breakfast, take a bath and hurriedly prepare for school. I was fortunate enough to be so much relaxed on my way to Rizal High School. I thought it would be impossible for me to go to school that morning. I was wrong.

I began my fourth year life.

P.S.
(Doo–bira)
Hold on to love
that is what I do
Now that I’ve found you
And from above
everything’s stinking
They’re not around you
And in the night
I could be helpless
I could be lonely
sleeping without you
And in the day
everything’s complex
There’s nothing simple
when I’m not around you
But I miss you when your gone
That is what I do, ba-ba-baby
And its going to carry on
That is what I knew, ba-ba-baby
(doo–bira)
Hold on to my hands
I feel like sinking
Sinking without you
And to my mind
everything’s stinking
Stinking without you
And in the night I could be helpless
I could be lonely
sleeping without you
And in the day
everything’s complex
There’s nothing simple
When I’m not around you
And I miss you when your gone
That is what I do, ba-ba-baby
And its going to carry on
That is what I knew, ba-ba-baby
(Doo-bira)
(Ba-ba-ba)

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