I fell in love.
Posted by Paurong sa Biyernes, Pebrero 16, 2007
Staring at a long, narrow, quiet corridor with no company, just you.
It’s what I always thought about talking to the Almighty One. Since He is a spirit, I often mistook it to be conversing to the subtle wind alone. I thought it is a stupid thing to “pray” because you have to close your eyes not to sleep but to have a conversation with someone you can’t see, you can’t feel and you can’t hear.
But He Himself proved me wrong.
One afternoon, I cuddled my pillow and cried having a feeling that I am alone and nothing can make me happy. Swiftly, a friend of mine asked my help to solve a problem between him and his girlfriend. After a couple of day, despite of the grudges I was bearing, I patched their relationship up and everything was fine again. Two lonely hearts were mended; two lovely people turned out to be happy again. I was surprised to learn that they were glad to have me in their lives. It seemed to be the first time I heard such compliment that would surely turn my life in a 180-degree rotation.
I was so happy. Loneliness faded away. Being alone, I quieted myself. I then discovered myself sitting on a corner of my bed. I didn’t know how to begin. I wanted to thank God for sending down earthly angels to me in the person of my true friends. I was not then totally alone! I closed my eyes and was more jubilant than being so much deeply in love, though at that time I started to! I initiated on praying—I thanked Him not only for giving me the two aforementioned people but also for almost every little blessing I had received. It was a miracle for me to chat with Him as free and comfortable as with chatting with people.
Last time, I was afraid to sit with Him and have some coffee because I felt I would be rejected, I thought He would chide me because of my sins, not knowing that praying is essential in walking along my Christian faith. He stretched out His arms and lent out His hands for me to hold on. The sins I was afraid to own up to people, I confessed to Him. I thought He would get mad at me. But I was wrong. Since then, I make it a point to have a date with Him everyday especially before I go to sleep. I was so deeply in love…
Last time, I thought no one sees, no one feels, no one hears. No. He sees me in what I do and guides and teaches me how to be strong by giving me small doses of troubles and predicaments for me to be able to handle the big ones. I feel him—he moves in mysterious ways and acts in different people he uses as instruments. He hears—if no, then why am I to tell you all of these.
Later on, I realized that I was not the only one talking. I began to hear His Voice inside my heart. I thought it would be a tedious talk but then I was indeed in the wrong. Kidding aside, it was an extravagant feeling.
The date, like no other, would not come to an end. Even though the candlelight is off, still the light of the love I feel for Him is glowing—even on the dreariest times of my life.