Posted by Paurong sa Lunes, Agosto 20, 2007
Music: King of Majesty – Hillsong United [ 12:15 am, my room ]
Being this age doesn’t necessarily bring the hell out of me. The figure shows that I still have an awful lot of things to learn. And so, I see to it that I can show the world who I really am by means of grasping my strengths and surmounting my weaknesses.
At school, I am a very forlorn person who is ofter than never defined as an emo not because of my hair or the way I dress up but because of my emotional differences juxtaposed to theirs. During lunch breaks, I always opt to be alone in a fastfood chain and am usually fed up on observing how other fellows act, talk and behave. Everytime an idea pop through the nerve cells of my cerebellum, I write it down. Queer as it may sound, I list down every name I hear, whether I know the person or not, dreaming that someday, somehow, I will be able to write stories with the help of the ideas I have been gathering and the myriad of names, of course.
One may ask if the emo-ness in me secludes me from the real world, leaving me behind without a single friend. My answer is definitely a gargantuan “No.” The word “barkada” has never been put on my dictionary, however. Friends for me may be or may not be there for you but there are true friends who will be there, staying for you, beside you no matter what struggle you will go through. I am not saying that I do not have friends at school, let alone childhood friends. Only, I have no guts to flaunt any circle of friends because I don’t have one.
The past grueling years of my life triggered and molded the emo-ness in me that is, well, apparent to anyone. Being a melancholic person made me see life more vividly. If not because of the emotional breakdowns and the incongruous hardships that I was able to surpass, I would not be the person I am right now. If not because of the number of realizations that life have catapulted on my senses, I would not be able to share my life to other people.
Sometimes, I can be a kind of help a despondent seeks. Sometimes, I can inspire and counsel. By and large, my emo-ness is not an emcumbrance on my being human.
Music: Brick – Ben Folds Five [ 5:35 pm, room ]
And here I go again, absorbing the delusional definition of lethargy. I am indulging myself on O2Jam sessions to have some fun. I just hope my mother won’t be right at the door again. Mom, just because you’re a supervisor on your company doesn’t authorize you to hinder this overwhelming endeavor!